If you have been following the craziness that has come out of that killing in South Carolina, you know there have been serious (seriously?) calls to erase history and anything associated with the South and the American Civil War, or as I prefer, The War of Northern Aggression. The mayor of New Orleans, instead of focusing on the problems of New Orleans, and they are legion, sees a need to focus on symbols, a fairly normal ploy for his party.
I linked to a blog post by Sally Asher here that sarcastically points out where this craziness can go, and don’t think it won’t go there, because some of what she jokes about is actually being suggested. But if this line is pursued, it has a disturbing possibility: that is we must choose a new LSU mascot! You see, there is a problem with the “Tiger” moniker—it is racist! At least under the new political-correctness-we-must-not-offend-anyone rules.
Obviously, you have not read my second book, An Eternity of Four Years, and you need to do that post-haste. If you had, you would know that Ethan joins the Confederate Army with a battalion of volunteers from Louisiana called Wheat’s Battalion, named after Chatham Roberdeau Wheat, its commander. One company in Wheat’s Battalion was called — wait for it — the Tiger Rifles!
“Big deal!” you say. But wait. There is more.
Sometime around the Battle of First Manassas when Wheat’s Battalion of rogues from Louisiana, though grossly outnumbered, distinguished themselves by holding off a Northern flanking movement until a defense could be pulled together, thus helping save the Army of Northern Virginia from almost certain defeat, Wheat’s Battalion became known as Wheat’s Tigers. (Try reading that one in one breath!)
There is still more…
Eventually, all Louisiana volunteers in the ANV became known as the Louisiana Tigers.
And guess where LSU got its mascot? Whoops!
Obviously, political correctness demands that be changed, lest it offend someone! How about the Pussy Cats? Nah, some people don’t like cats. The Puppy Dogs? Nah, some people don’t like dogs. (There is no accounting for taste.)
I know! The “Nothings!” The only thing that won’t offend someone is nothing.
There—problem solved. The LSU Nothings. Has a nice ring to it, don’t ya think?
God help us!
(My younger son, an LSU grad, is probably angry with me now for letting this cat, a tiger as it were, out of the bag.)